1. An official visit by MG Santa (NMI)
Claus is expected at our headquarters 25 December 2006. The
following instructions will be in effect and govern the activities
of all personnel during this visit:
a. Not a creature will stir without
official permission. This will include indigenous mice. Special
stirring permits for necessary administrative actions will be
obtained through normal command channels. Mice stirring permits will
be obtained through the office of OSURG, Veterinary Services.
b. Personnel will settle their brains for
a long winter nap prior to 2200 hours, 24 December 2006. Uniform for
the nap will be: Pajamas, cotton, light, drowsing, with kerchief,
general purpose, camouflage; and Cap, camouflage w/ear flaps.
Equipment will be drawn from CIF prior to 1900 hours, 24 December
2006.
c. Personnel will utilize standard ration
sugar plums for visions to dance through their heads. This item will
be drawn from the servicing dining facility(DFAC).
d. Stockings, wool, cushion sole, will be
hung by the chimney with care. Necessary safety precautions will be
taken to avoid fire hazards caused by carelessly hung stockings.
Unit Safety Officers will submit stocking hanging plans to this
headquarters prior to 0800 hours, 24 December 2006, ATTN:AEAGA-S,
for approval.
e. At the first sign of clatter from the
lawn, all troops will spring from their beds to evaluate noise and
cause. Immediate action will be taken to tear open the shutters and
thrown open the window sashes. ODCSOPS Plan (Saint Nick), Reference
LO No. 3, paragraph 6c, this headquarters, 2 February 1999, will be
in effect to facilitate shutter tearing and sash throwing. Division
chiefs will familiarize all personnel with procedures and are
responsible for ensuring that no shutters are torn open nor window
sashes thrown prior to start of official clatter.
f. Prior to 2400, 24 December 2006, all
personnel will be assigned "Wondering Eye" stations. After shutters
are thrown and sashes are torn, these stations will be manned.
- ODCSLOG will assign one each Sleigh, miniature, M-66, and
eight (8) deer, rein, tiny, for use by MG Claus’ who, in
accordance with current directives and other applicable
regulations, must have a valid SF 56 properly annotated by Driver
Testing; be authorized rooftop parking and be able to shout "On
Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer and Vixen, up Comet, up Cupid, on
Donner and Blitzen." without error.
2. MG Claus will enter quarters through
standard chimneys. All units without chimneys will draw Chimney
Simulator, M-6, for use during ceremonies. Chimney simulator units
will be requested on Engineer Job Order Request Form submitted to
the Furniture Warehouse prior to 19 December 2006, and issued on DA
Form 3161, Request for Issue or Turn-In.
3. Personnel will be rehearsed on shouting
"Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night." This shout will be
given on termination of General Claus’ visit. Uniformity of shouting
is the responsibility of division chiefs.